I am getting crazy, anxious, scared. Next week I have to go for a scan and on thursday we will know if the radiation therapy has had a good result.
I have so many questions for the professor, but I am scared, even with a good result, that he will not be able to answer them.
The biggest question: “when will the tumor come back?” or in case of a bad result: “How long do I have?”
I’m sure, he can’t answer, in both cases.
The proof that I am really crazy, is that those big questions are not the ones I am most concerned about.
I want to know if I can go and see my family in Turkey or Wales in february, when or if I am ever going to drive my car again, if my exercises are going to make me fit enough to ever babysit my nephews again, and what about adoption, ever?
I thank Allah for my husband who is there for me every time to chase the crazyness away and make me realise I am already blessed.
I have had a really hard week…
